Wednesday, November 26, 2008

Yeah....right.

So the Financial Times had a piece yesterday about how Pakistan's government was going to remove the military from politics. They said they had disbanded the political wing of the ISI, Pakistan's intelligence agency in order to "sharply reduce the military's influence in politics." Yup. They just gave up, rolled up their tents and went home. "We're done. No more politics for us. It was just getting to be too much of a hassle."

And if you believe that, I have a few leftover WMD's you may be interested in in Iraq.

Oh...but it gets better. According to the FT, "Asif Ali Zardari made one of the strongest overtures of any Pakistani president to India. He offered to abandon Pakistan's first-strike nuclear threat, sign a South Asian nuclear non-proliferation treaty and join India in an economic union."

I know what you're thinking..."where did they find that much tequila in a muslim country?"

Congratulations!!

Good news this morning from London where my dear friend Laura Winter and her partners Ivan O'Mahoney and Karen O'Connor won the Foreign Press Award for TV Feature Story of the Year for "The Boys from Baghdad High" shown on BBC's This World. The documentary also aired on HBO last summer. The premise is great: they gave digital video cameras to 6 boys in Baghdad and asked them to record their last year in high school.

Sunday, November 23, 2008

Persona Non Grata and other items

You know things are bad in Zimbabwe when they won't let Jimmy Carter in. Come on.....Jimmy Carter?? Clearly the 84 year old Nobel Prize winner is a threat to 84 year old Mugabe. Maybe they could have a cage match. Carter showed up with Kofi Annan and they wouldn't let him in either. Carter and Annan are part of a group called The Elders that was originally assembled by Sir Richard Branson and Peter Gabriel and announced by Nelson Mandela on his 89th birthday. The group is currently chaired by Archbishop Desmond Tutu.

Carter and Annan join a distinguished list of folks who have been denied entry to Zimbabwe. They include, reporters from the BBC, The Times, The Daily Telegraph, The Sun and The Mirror and for good measure, the Dutch Human Rights Ambassador. Because it's so important to keep the riff raff out.

Elsewhere....

In Moscow, the murder trial of journalist Anna Politkovskaya has been re-opened to the public. For now. The three men on trial are accused of being involved in the murder, but not for doing the actual killing. The proceedings so far make the old American sitcom Night Court look like a serious courtroom drama.

Meanwhile, in Dubai....

The two Britons accused of making love on the beach had their jail terms suspended and have been ordered to leave the country. I hope these two rocket scientists realize what a gift they just received.

Friday, November 21, 2008

45 YEARS???!!!???!?!

So the authorities in Myanmar sentenced a comedian...A COMEDIAN...to 45 years for trying to deliver aid to cyclone victims. Well sure, he had it coming. Who was he to make the military look bad? Forget the rallying in the streets and rioting, nothing scares a junta like a comic with a sharp tongue.

I am reminded of Pastor Martin Niemoller's poem about Germany's intellectuals, and I made a few changes....

They first came for the mimes, and I didn't speak up because I wasn't a mime.
Then they came for the ventriloquists, and I didn't speak up because I wasn't a vent.
Then they came for the guitar acts, and I didn't speak up because I wasn't a guitar act.
Then they came for the political comics, and there was no one left to speak up.
45 years indeed.

Thursday, November 20, 2008

Rothko......I don't think so...

So, I was in London last week and stopped off at the Tate Modern to check out the Rothko exhibit. And yes, I realize this isn't foreign policy, but it's in London. And it's my blog.

So...the Rothko exhibit.

I don't get it. The canvas is black. OK....some of them are red.

Kierkegaard and Sartre get mentioned in the notes. It's very fancy. Lot of young couples staring at the large canvases and whispering. The women whisper, the men nod, clueless as usual.

But at the end of the day, the canvas is still black.

There is a lot of hubris and spin involved.

But the canvas is still black.

"Oh no. There are shades of black. And they have a lot of meaning."

Maybe to you, but to me they are black.

But my hat is off to Rothko. He pulled it off.

Wednesday, November 19, 2008

Democracy IS a contact sport

It looks like Iraq will be fielding a team to the Legislative Brawling World Championship. According to the New York Times, "a session of Iraq’s Parliament collapsed in chaos on Wednesday, as a discussion among lawmakers about a three-year security agreement with the Americans boiled over into shouting and physical confrontation."

I'm not sure where the inaugural tournament will be held. Taiwan and South Korea have both put in bids. Representatives from Taiwan cited its long history of "physical democracy" pointing to a BBC article which noted that back in 2001, MP Lo Fu-chu was suspended from parliament for six months after punching a female colleague.

Bookmakers note that the Ukraine, though relatively new to parliamentary brawling, are going off at decent odds due to their recent activities.

South Korea is a perennial favorite and is expected to field a tough team.

Georgia, still reeling from its altercation with Russia, has a small team but is expected to attend.

The other nations rounding out the field are Mexico, India and Russia.

Ah yes. Full contact democracy. They used to fight in the streets with guns and knives. Now it's moving indoors and they are using fists.
No matter how you feel about it, it is progress.

Morning nuggets...

While looking for something to write about today....I found these two items. The first is one of those uh oh moments. The other reminds me that this is truly a wide and diverse world and that I will never see it all.

First your uh oh moment.

The BBC had this headline today: Nepali Police 'Torture Children.' How'd you like to be the prime minister's press secretary. "Uh....sir....I don't think you're going to like this." Indeed, how DO you spin torturing of children.

The next item is from Germany's Der Spiegel Online. I don't work blue, but .....well...this was delivered on a platter.

In the southern Balkans, a small Muslim ethnic group maintains its collective identity by means of mass circumcision. Once every five years, villagers gather to ordain their boys. And to party for four straight days.

It's all part of something called Sunet a tradition there for several centuries. And here's the kicker.....

At last year's Sunet, 130 boys from 10 months to five years -- some brought from abroad -- were circumcised by 70 year old Zylfikar Shishko, a barber from the nearby town of Prizren who has been performing the role for the last 45 years.

Yes indeed, when I'm thinking of skilled medical talent, I immediately think Floyd the barber. Enjoy your breakfast.

Tuesday, November 18, 2008

Fraud monitors? We don't need no stinking fraud monitors

So the New York Times reports that Maliki's government is quietly firing fraud monitors. And why not. After all, government oversight is anathema to business. And things are running so smoothly over there. Besides, downsizing government is always a good thing. And really, the fraud isn't that much. Just $13 billion. I mean, you have to look at the big picture. When you consider that we've spent nearly a trillion dollars over there, $13 billion...well....that's just the foam off the top of a cold mug of beer.

Of course, when you're restructuring government, you're going to step on a few toes. There have been some sour apples. According to the Times, "Chris King, a former United States Embassy official who was a senior adviser to the integrity commission said the inspectors general were in many ways one of the last firewalls preventing the Iraqi government from keeping its operations largely in the dark."

And yet, they persevere. The article goes on to say that, "each of Iraq’s 30 cabinet-level ministries has one inspector general." And so far, officials who are paying attention say that anywhere from 7 to 9 of them have been dismissed. I know, change comes slowly. On the bright side, they have gotten rid of the inspector general of the Central Bank of Iraq. And we all know how important it is to let banks do their own thing.

However, I think they can do better. I believe that with a little effort (read - good old American know how) they can clean house for good. But they need leadership. They need someone who is ruthless. Someone who is practiced in the art of secrecy. They need Dick Cheney. And guess what? Dick will be available in January.

I'm just here to help.

Monday, November 17, 2008

The ship belongs to WHO??

Not much in the news these days about that Ukrainian ship with the tanks somewhere off the coast of Somalia. Today it's all about the supertanker filled with a $100 million worth of crude. Now all they have to do is hijack a refinery and they're in business.

Call me a naive, but you'd think the NSA has eyes on that part of the world 24/7 and has the kind of resolution on their satellites that allows them to see what the pirates are having for lunch let alone where they are.

Still, you have to think that the pirates are scared. I mean it's one thing to piss off the Ukrainians, but to grab a $100 million worth of crude from the Saudis? You know, where they cut off a limb for theft? Nope. They are toast. They don't make a Hallmark card for that.

Saturday, November 15, 2008

Who ordered the duck?

So do you think they had separate checks at the White House last night? And I bet the jockeying for seats was intense.

"I wanna sit next to Hu Jintao!"
"No way. You sat next to him last time."
"Did not."
"Did so."
"Go sit next to Merkel."
"Bush is sitting next to Merkel, and she wants to move away from him."
"Well then go sit over with Bambang?"
"Who?"
"The Indonesian guy."
"Naah. I can't pronounce his first name."
"Then go sit next to Brown"
"And fall asleep in my soup? No way."

Ah yes. Money changes everything.

Thursday, November 13, 2008

G20 and the Free Market

I, like President Bush, am also a "free market guy," but this weekend as the leaders of the world's largest economies gather in Washington D. C. in $600 a night hotel rooms to wine and dine and talk about the mess we are in, I hope someone notes that with all the recent bailouts globally, right now, the "free market" isn't "free."

Afghan Solution: A Dinner and a Movie

This morning brings news of another car bomb in Afghanistan and young girls blinded by acid just because they were on their way to school. This is not good. And yet, you know this is will continue unless something changes. So, here is a solution.

Instead of pouring more and more guns and arms into the country, it is time to use the money differently. Rather than enriching arms companies, lets give the money directly to the Afghan people. Here are some rough numbers. According to the CIA World Fact book, the work force there numbers 15 million. The GDP per capita in Afghanistan is $1000 a year. So far, we have dumped enough money into Afghanistan over the last 6 years, that if we had just given them the money the per capita would have doubled to $2000.

So again, what the heck, let's put everyone on the payroll and double their income. Now, flush with cash, they have "disposable income." And you know what folks do with disposable income? That's right, they go to a dinner and a movie.

Next thing you know, restaurants will be popping up all across the land. The Poppy Garden, Osamabee's, whatever. Followed by 14 plex movie theaters.

Now how are they going to get to the restaurant and theater? You got it, a car. Soon Chevy and GM dealers will dot the landscape which will help our economy. After car dealers, come insurance companies. And with insurance companies come golf tournaments. And soon they'll be turning poppy fields into golf courses.

What? Like the current plan is working?